Week in words
Michael Owen likes being substituted, apparently - unless he's been misquoted of course... surely not?
Thursday, 03, Apr 2008 05:04
Sportspeople say the funniest things...
inthenews.co.uk takes a look back at the last week, collecting some of the most insightful, sublime and frankly ridiculous things that our sporting heroes have come out with.
This week, Dwain Chambers on rugby league; Michael Owen on the joy of substitutions; and David Pizarro on Cristiano Ronaldo.
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"I'm always trying to take it to another level, regardless. If I'm playing on cloud nine, I'm trying to get to cloud ten, and actually cloud 11."
Venus Williams on win over Caroline Wozniacki at Sony Ericsson Open in Miami.
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"X-rays show that Eduardo is making satisfactory progress and the full cast on his left leg was removed and has been replaced with an air boot for protection. Eduardo's road to recovery is on schedule and he will now start his rehabilitation programme."
Good news from Arsenal on Eduardo, who is finally out of his cast - over five weeks after the original injury.
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"To be named as the vice-captain of what is an elite side, containing many wonderful players, is a huge honour."
New Australian cricket vice-captain Michael Clarke, rubbing it in that his team are so much better than everyone else in the world put together.
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"It's unfair. But in a way this is the best thing that could have happened to me, because when I'm angry - I'm good."
Cocky British sprint swimmer Mel Marshall, after she was told she was no longer eligible to compete in certain events in Beijing because she was five minutes late turning up for a qualifying event.
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"Everyone knows I'm a striker who scores goals, but I've enjoyed coming off."
Michael Owen apparently likes being substituted?
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"Erm.."
Dwain Chambers' first reply when asked how many players make up a rugby league team. He was quickly prompted towards the correct answer by his lawyer, but it doesn't exactly bode well for the early part of his one-month trial.
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"We're busted. We only had 17 players [on Sunday] and lost two more to injury so you do the sums. I would say his chances of playing in the first grade are high, at least 50-50 for this weekend."
Castleford Tigers coach Terry Matterson when asked how soon Chambers would be thrown into the team lineup. This weekend, Terry? Really? The same guy who doesn't know how many players he should be walking out onto the field with?
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"This is not a publicity stunt."
"The club can't lose anything by this. It will bring people through the gates."
Castleford's bosses seem to be contradicting each other a little here over the 'Chambers factor'.
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"You're not happy for your opponent, because it's never a way you want to win a match, but you've got to push him to give up."
It seems Roger Federer has his ruthless streak back, admitting he did everything he could to force Sony Ericsson Open third round opponent Robin Soderling to retire through injury.
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"We are obviously disappointed that Imtiaz has chosen to withdraw his interest, having regarded him highly. However, the fact that Imtiaz has withdrawn does not mean that, by default, we will be left with a candidate who is, in any way, inferior to him."
Isn't that exactly what it means, ICC president David Morgan? He was speaking after Imtiaz Patel pulled out of the race to become the new chief executive.
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"I want to be the best in the world and that's what I work towards every day. But only God knows whether I will one day manage to win that prize which is so important for me as a player."
Cristiano Ronaldo will only be satisfied when he has proved to Ronaldinho, Kaka, et al that he is top dog.
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"That was just a bad serve."
Andy Murray's straightforward reply when asked how he managed to serve a double fault on match point in his Sony Ericsson Open second round match against Mario Ancic - a game he later went on to lose.
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"It's a bad blow that emphasises the futility of these games. Darren was recovering from a bad chest cold, which is why we rested him against Liverpool. He should have only played for 45 minutes, 60 at most, but he played the full game for Scotland. Now we've lost him for six weeks."
Darren Fletcher pulls up in the closing minutes of Scotland's friendly against Croatia last week, and somehow Sir Alex Ferguson manages to find someone to blame - bizarrely because the player's 'bad chest cold' landed him with an ankle injury.
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"He's a living legend."
Hampshire's concise, but accurate, summary of Shane Warne - who has been forced to end his association with the county after eight county cricket seasons.
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"Football has benefited greatly from the backing of television and Chelsea as much as anyone else. However this decision is one step too far and we reserve all rights on our position."
Chelsea, commenting on the fixture congestion caused by moving their game against Everton to Thursday night, proving that no matter how big or how rich the club, there is always something to moan about.
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"The relationship with Barcelona is strained."
Ronaldinho's agent decides to drum up some business for his client this summer.
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"This partnership has been unworkable for some time."
The final nail in the coffin, in which lies the relationship between Liverpool's American co-owners and 'close business partners' Tom Hicks and George Gillett.
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"He's a big head and a show off."
AS Roma midfielder David Pizarro's response to questions about Cristiano Ronaldo, who opened the scoring for Manchester United in their decisive 2-0 win in the Italian capital. Sour grapes anyone?
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Alistair Potter