The week in words

"Give me all your money!"
"Give me all your money!"
 

Also In The News

Barca struggle past Schalke to set up semi-final with United

Barcelona have qualified for the semi-finals of the Champions League following an unconvincing 1-0 win over German side Schalke 04.

Rijkaard's side progressed to the last four of the Champions League
 

Thursday, 10, Apr 2008 05:03

Sportspeople say the funniest things...

inthenews.co.uk takes a look back at the last week, collecting some of the most insightful, sublime and frankly ridiculous things that our sporting heroes have come out with.

This week, Lehmann on Almunia; Chelsea on TV deals for football; and Keegan on Mike Ashley's wallet.

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"For the avoidance of doubt we wish to make it plain that David, Karren and Birmingham City FC deny absolutely any wrongdoing."

Birmingham City plead innocence after Karren Brady and David Sullivan are questioned by police involved in a corruption probe. And, after five similar announcements, the club again made it clear there was no funny business on their behalf.

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"You can't break the curse unless you've won the par three to begin with."

Pre-Masters par-three winner Rory Sabbatini takes a philosophical view after a member of the press asks him if he believes in the curse of the tournament, that says whoever wins it cannot win the Masters.

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"I don't find it very funny being forced to sit on the bench for a man who didn't start playing until he was 30. I am very angry."

Moaning Jens Lehmann just won't give it a rest over Manuel Almunia's continued selection ahead of him in the Arsenal team.

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"Constantly over the last 12 months people have been asking me and it gets a bit embarrassing to be honest. You give them dates because you think you're coming back but it never materialises, but the fans have always been great to me."

Gary Neville on his year-long battle to get fit, and why he was 'on the verge of a comeback' for about 11 months of that layoff.

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"I believe the defeat is down to a dodgy decision from the referee. It is difficult to swallow."

Arsene Wenger blames Arsenal's Champions League defeat on the officials. Hands up, who saw that coming?

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"Why are German military uniforms worn? Why does he issue orders and threats in German to women who cannot speak German? Why does he deliver and count out beatings in German to women who cannot understand German? We look forward to Mr Mosley's answers to all these questions."

The News of the World poses a few questions to FIA president Max Mosley after being allowed to publish a video of his alleged 'Nazi orgy' on its website.

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"If they want to package Ronaldinho for me I would accept him and be very happy. I'll phone the owner."

Sven-Goran Eriksson isn't exactly cagey when asked if there is any truth in the rumours Manchester City might make an audacious bid for Barcelona star Ronaldinho in the summer.

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"My work is connected with the world of football and it is usual for me to travel and talk about personal matters when I think it is necessary."

Ronaldinho's agent Roberto de Assis launches a defence of his comments that seemed to declare the playmaker is ready to move on this summer. Not that much of a defence though, is it?

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"The standard he is playing right now, he is not viable in the side. He frustrates me. He can be a world player but he is not playing to his potential."

Andy Caddick sums up the feelings of every English cricket fan when referring to Steve Harmison.

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"If they stop us getting into Europe there will be all hell to pay and I'll be first in the queue."

Cardiff City's Dave Jones after setting up a potential headache for the Football Association by having the temerity to be manager of a Welsh side and reaching the final of the English FA Cup.

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"I would love to stay, it is a fantastic club and I love everything about it, but I have got to be realistic. If I want to have any aspirations of playing for England, or furthering my career, then I have to be playing - and that doesn't seem to be the case at the moment."

It looks doubtful that perennial Anfield bench-warmer Peter Crouch will stay at Liverpool beyond the end of the season.

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"Mr Ashley said he wanted to win something in three-and-a-half years. When we sit down in the next few weeks we will see how desperate he is to win something in that time."

Newcastle United boss Kevin Keegan's impassioned plea for a big wad of cash from owner Mike Ashley this summer.

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"Under these circumstances Chelsea FC believes it would be inappropriate to profit from the television fee for this match as per normal so the fee will be used to purchase the available away tickets at no charge to our supporters and to procure as many trains and/or coaches as possible needed to get them to the game and home safely, also at no charge."

Chelsea are in a surprisingly charitable mood after offering their fans free tickets and travel to the rearranged game against Everton next Thursday.

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Alistair Potter


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