Steel Panther: Feel the Steel
Steel Panther ask you to Feel the Steel
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Monday, 01, Jun 2009 04:04
Island, out June 8th.
In a nutshell...
Sublime and ridiculous spandex-clad, parody hair metal.
What's it all about?
According to Steel Panther's promotional information this is an album 20 years in the making that can only be described as a "mythical masterpiece". In actual fact it's a tribute-cum-parody hair metal record that is drenched in 80s bubblegum pop hooks and wrapped from head to toe in the kind of foul-mouthed, sexist lyrics that would make Roy Chubby Brown blush.
Who's it by?
Who Steel Panther claim to be and who they actually are appear to be two very separate entities. If you listen to the band themselves they are the 80s glam heroes that never quite got round to having their time in the sun, but now they're back to show the Poisons and Motley Crues of this world how it's done. In reality they are utterly tongue-in-cheek and have become the new darlings of the Sunset Strip thanks to their eye-popping live shows, enough hairspray to single-handedly take down the Ozone layer and their over-the-top, the-Darkness-on-speed comedy rock stylings.
As an example...
"And you won't have to wonder/If you caught VD/You'll be screaming my name,
when you sit down to pee." - Girl From Oklahoma
Likelihood of a trip to the Grammys
Slim and none. These boys are far too foul to mix it with the back-slapping, industry bigwigs.
What the others say
"Pure Whitesnake, it's worth noting that while the tunes here have lyrics that are f***ing hilarious all the way through, the songs themselves are killer." - MetalHammer.co.uk
"Sounds like G 'n' R, Bon Jovi and Poison, all rolled into one." - Komodorock.com
So is it any good?
There is absolutely nothing subtle, nor serious, about Steel Panther. Let's make this absolutely clear, these boys are complete, downright dirt with the filthiest minds ever to earn a record deal. They make Motley Crue sound like Hannah Montana.
Speaking of which, Feel the Steel sounds exactly like Motley Crue did back in the 80s when they still made decent albums. Add in a dash of Iron Maiden, a dollop of Poison and a pinch of Bon Jovi and you've got the Steel Panther sound.
They lampoon these hair metal heroes so well that they've actually come up with a collection of riffs that could fit seamlessly into any of their back catalogues.
However, while the music resembles the work of Mick Mars, CC DeVille and co, the lyrics are a whole new ball game. Frontman Michael Starr has penned some incredibly amusing lines, which pinball from the tongue-in-cheek to the obscene, stopping off at the downright offensive along the way.
Asian Hooker is probably the worst offender, the less of which is said the better, but it's far from an isolated incident. We're best to not even get into which part of his body Starr claims is community property on the track of the same name, while Fat Girl is unlikely to win him too many female fans.
Potential controversies aside, the most important thing about any album is whether there's any decent tunes, and Feel the Steel definitely has plenty, regardless of whether they are a complete send-up of the bands that they sound so much like.
The Shocker, Eatin' Ain't Cheatin' and Party All Day would have graced the best of pop metal albums at the genre's peak, with the latter including a fantastic nod to Bon Jovi in its opening before launching into territory that Jon Bon Jovi and Richie Sambora always stayed a million miles away from. Meanwhile, the aforementioned Commercial Property has all the makings of a classic Every Rose Has Its Thorns-style heartfelt ballad, until Starr opens his mouth that is.
Some things really are best left in the past, but with Feel the Steel, Steel Panther prove that good songs really are timeless. Yes it's hair metal, yes it's downright filth and yes it's possibly the least serious album of the decade, but a good song is a good song and this is crammed full of them, with metal licks and pop melodies entwined superbly to ensure that if the jokes wear thin, there's still some substance to the album.
Fans of the Motley Crues and Poisons of this world will no doubt find plenty to enjoy, if they are prepared to laugh at themselves and the bands that they idolise that is. Meanwhile, lovers of close-to-the-bone, dirty-minded humour will be in their element, with even the most ardent of over-the-top 80s pop-rock haters having to admit that this is one hair metal album that is well worth a listen.
8/10
Richard Chamberlain