N-Dubz: Against All Odds
N-Dubz: Against All Odds
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By Michael Younger. |  |
Wednesday, 18, Nov 2009 02:02
All Around The World, out now.
What's it all about?
Essentially it's all about words you don't understand, sung and rapped in accents you don't understand, by youths you don't understand, wearing clothes you don't understand, made for other youths you don't understand.
Who's it by?
After the success of debut album Uncle B, N-Dubz have found themselves household names. Even senile old Granddad is likely to recognise Dappy in his trademark 's**t' hat. Chances are he's taken more of a shine to female vocalist Tulisa however.
As an example...
"You weren't saying shit when I was gripping on your pelvis, now you're trying to act up saying that I'm selfish/And I ain't ready for no pikney, I can't help it, it's too late to say I shoulda wore a helmet." - Shoulda Put Something On
What the others say
"While it's hardly exploding with originality, and the various references to Facebook and how many records they've sold do grate, this is a record brimming with vitality and chutzpah." - Guardian
"The band's likeable quirks sit oddly with production that's half British nightclub, half overblown R 'n' B. The result is absolutely not intended for anyone over 20." - Telegraph
So is it any good?
Let's make no bones about it, this is what people are listening to. Sure we can bury our heads in the Observer Music Monthly, listen to 6Music, and go and see Daniel Johnston play in Tamworth Tosshole, but at the end of the day this is what the kids want, and N-Dubz are going to give it them. In spades.
Whilst a book should never be judged by its cover, in this case a record should indeed be at least semi-assessed, the sleeve being as good as a monument to 21st century living. Pages and pages are devoted to what the band are wearing, and using, as subtle an advertisement as a Go Compare television commercial. We are told, (in excessive detail) how to have hair, make-up and the 'glam fifties' look of Tulisa, how to apply a hat like Dappy's (seemingly gone are the days when hat-wearing required little instruction other than 'put it on your head'), and Fazer's sound dressing advice: "just make sure you are comfortable." Well, quite.
The handy 'N-Dubz Glossary' is also a perk, revealing the meaning of the words "Shabarky" (someone is looking at you) and "Loofi" (a term of endearment apparently- try using it in a Tower Hamlets back alley at midnight and see how it works out).
Of course, all this is foreplay, a mild tickling before the full-on penetrative musical side of things. Connoisseurs will be pleased to know it is business very much as usual on that side of things. We have references to a hard-knock past, brags about the financial recompense of their previous album, and a good few schmaltzy moments designed to soundtrack furtive fumblings in bus shelters across the nation. We have ludicrous moments, such as the heartfelt ode to contraceptive sheathing Shoulda Put Something On, and bizarre cameos (a song written by Gary Barlow?). Fortunately we also have energy, ideas and passion in spades. I Need You is a story about chatting to an impressive member of the opposite sex, nipping to the toilet then finding out they have cleared off and the subsequent frantic scouring of Facebook to find them. It's a subject close to the heart of any desperate singleton, and should therefore prove a massive hit. We also have Number 1, their big chart moment with Tinchy Stryder. It's present here in a version which lays off the Stryder and ladles on the Dubz in a move which suggests sour grapes, but it's here nonetheless and, in case you weren't aware, it's one of the best pop songs since Britney went potty.
So, to sum up, you'll probably never like it. You won't understand it, you won't comprehend it, you'll use them as a nice object to indulge in a bit of class snobbery, but you're wrong. Deal with it.
Plus, if you were wondering, "I did ask Tulisa and she told me: 'I will never shag a man unless I love him'". So there Gramps. Forget it.
7/10
Tom Williams