Paradise Lost
Monday, 04 Jun 2007 16:10
Melissa George and Olivia Wilde in bikinis should help bring in the male audience
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Directed by John Stockwell, out now in cinemas, starring Melissa George, Olivia Wilde, Josh Duhamel, Miguel Lunardi, running time 93 minutes.
In a nutshell
Brazil, babes, bikinis, blood.
What's it all about
A group of travellers in Brazil get chatting after the bus they are taking crashes and falls down a hill. The group consists of three Americans including Alex and his sister Bea (Olivia Wilde), one Australian named Pru (Melissa George) who speaks Portuguese and boasts that she has "been everywhere that they tell you not to go", and two stereotypical 'Brits abroad' - sexist, culturally ignorant, pleasure-seeking drunks.
While discussing what they should do by way of transport, the group happen upon an idyllic beach bar. Cue bikinis, breast-flashing, volleyball-playing, drinking, dancing and sex. While the travellers enjoy themselves, however, the bar hostess makes a secret call to a mysterious evil doctor (Miguel Lunardi) informing him that six more 'gringos' have arrived. The group also befriend a Brazilian man named Kiko because they are endeared by his efforts to practice his English on them.
The next morning, the travellers realise that they were drugged and that all of their possessions have been stolen. After angering the locals, the group are alone and afraid, so they follow Kiko to his uncle's house, where they are told they will be safe. Despite finding that the strange house has a curious number of surgical instruments, drugs and foreigner's passports stashed away, the friends decide to stay. However, they are surprised when the evil doctor arrives and reveals his plans to take their organs.
Who's in it?
The only two members of the cast with a tenuous claim to have had previous acting experience both made their names by setting teenage boys' pulses racing. Melissa George did so in her heyday playing Angel in the Australian tea-time soap Home and Away. Olivia Wilde did the same by snogging Mischa Barton in the OC. The other actors are mostly unrecognisable and are likely to remain so after this film. None of them act badly however and their performances are about as good as this dud of a script allows.
As an example
"There better be a big bag of f***ing weed at this house." – Finn, one of the Brits, as Kiko leads them to his uncle's house.
"The whole history of this country is that you've taken from us…but I think there's something I can do to help you give something back." – The evil doctor as he slices up his first victim.
Likelihood of a trip to the Oscars
Highly unlikely.
What the others say
"While perfectly watchable, this isn't twisted enough to thrill fans of Hostel's brand of sado-horror." - Empire
"You weren't seriously expecting this to be a version of Milton's epic, now were you?" – The Sunday Times
So is it any good?
Made by the director of Blue Crush, the early parts of Paradise Lost are likely to be boy-pleasers. However, even die-hard fans of the 'torture-porn' genre will probably find the film a disappointment. The gore and the action sequences lack originality and spontaneity as well as any tangible suspense. The scene where Melissa George demonstrates the art of getting into a bikini without quite popping out of it (but almost) is as gratuitous as the one where the evil doctor shoves a kebab skewer into someone's eye.
All of the characters are merely caricatures and it is impossible to have any kind of sympathy for them, especially seeing as they have at least three chances to escape from the house before the doctor gets to them.
The best thing about the film is the realistic portrayal of bratty, privileged travellers who want to 'experience the culture'. The girls are charmed by what they perceive to be Kiko's simple, earnest desire to make western friends, while the boys are honest about coming to Brazil because they like drinking and women who look like Gisele.
However, in terms of the film's ability to deliver in the ways it is supposed to, it really doesn't. An appallingly trite ending ensures that paradise is found again when you leave the cinema.
3/10
Natasha Hegde
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