In Review

08 January 2009 12:24 BST

Confessions of a Lapdancer by Anonymous

Published by Avon Books, out now, paperback, 374 pp, £6.99.

In a nutshell...

Trite, trashy, annoying. With sex.

What's it all about?

Geri is girl fighting to make her way in a man's world. Fortunately, her money worries are answered when she discovers a hidden talent for lapdancing, pole dancing and sleeping with her clients. However, soon the seedier side of her evening job threatens her very safety.

Who's it by?

Anonymous. I refuse to believe this is because it is a true tale from a successful woman in the City, I think the publishers have decided the author's name would add nothing whereas 'anonymous' leaves the impression of secrecy and sincerity.

As an example...

"'You're just buttering me up for some girl-on-girl action, you slut,' I say and flick my lacy black thong at her ... I can only imagine what you're thinking but please don't judge me. I'm just a modern woman trying to make her way in a man's world."

Likelihood of becoming a Hollywood blockbuster

Not a hope – although the internet suggests a film version could be in production as we speak.

So is it any good?

Confessions of a Lapdancer is inadequate as a work of fiction or erotica. It lacks a decent plot and any sense of sincerity, leaving the reader with no sympathy or interest in the character as she fends off assailants with a clear-heel stiletto at the same time as planning the next day's board meeting.

I am no prude; it is not the subject matter or the sex which I object to. It is the complete lack of plot, character development and point. This book relies on titillation and pseudo-feminist ranting to engage the reader, it has very little else.

Confessions clearly aims to be a gorgeous, sexy and provocative adult novel but it is more like a drunk teenager in improbable heels and too much makeup.

2/10

Felicity King-Evans

"Quite personally I am more than half way through this book, I have not been able to put it down. It grabs a woman in the sort of way that you wish you were her. Geri, to me, is a very strong character as every woman would wish to be. She's sexy, glam and powerful. The book does everything it can to draw you in and it's great amount of sexual exploration becomes intoxicating. Don't get me wrong I'm not a sex-deprived lunatic looking for something to quench my thirst, I just find this book so easy going and thrilling." - Leanne Burrell